How to WORK with your partner, CRUSH your career and NOT break up

How to WORK with your partner, CRUSH your career and NOT break up

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Click here to download your FREE guide to 100x YOUR EFFICIENCY IN 10 EASY STEPS: https://bit.ly/3F8qOJL Build IRONCLAD discipline in this FREE workshop: https://bit.ly/3RUnYux I've been working with my spouse for almost two decades now, and in this video I'm going to teach you how to do it well. Just be warned, you may hate the answer. This topic is big enough to warrant its own book, but if people won't give you a simple answer to a complicated topic it's because they don't understand it well enough. So here you go, I'm going to give it to you in a sentence: To work well with your significant other you must each play a clearly defined role. Sex and Entrepreneurship are both team sports. And if you're doing it alone it can still be cool, but it's called something else entirely. Here's how we did it: Brief history: As a couple, so far Lisa and I have built two incredibly successful companies. If you've never heard of me before, I'm Tom Bilyeu, and my wife Lisa and I sold our last company for a billion dollars and have already built another multi-million dollar company since then which has garnered roughly half a billion views, and is rapidly growing. Here's the trick to managing both love and business. Step 1. Choose well. Selection is 80% of the battle in romance. If you can't find someone amazing, masterbate. And keep looking. Because a bad relationship is worse than no relationship at all. That goes for business and love. Unless you want to split your company up in the divorce, don't mess up this step. It will be ruinous. A business will not bring you together any more than kids will. It will expose your flaws. What makes someone amazing? Most of that is going to be intensely personal. You'd probably hate being married to me, but my wife swears she loves it. Maybe there's just no accounting for taste. Or maybe we selected well. I'll let you be the judge, but here is the criteria we've refined over the years for people who ask this questions: Gotta be love. Bit like pornography. Hard to describe, but you'll know it when you see it. Committed to maintaining a thriving sex life Committed to the relationship Has a growth mindset Shares most of your values On balance is your equal On balance is emotionally stable Plays a different, but complementary role in the relationship Legitimately wants you to be happy Takes full responsibility for their actions and emotional state All of those are important, but our secret weapon is that both Lisa and I have a growth mindset. We focus on the relationship and are constantly trying to improve. We've always been receptive to critical feedback because our goals are clear and we understand that to achieve them we have to constantly get better. Whether that's being better spouses or being better entrepreneurs, constant never-ending improvement is required for progress. If you or your partner doesn't already have that mentality, then stop watching this video now and address that. You simply will not succeed working with your spouse if you don't both have a growth mindset. Step 2. Define your roles. Lisa and I realized early on that no relationship will survive two alphas fighting for control. This is a team sport. You each need to have a clearly defined role and play it well. Lisa and I have found that this tends to break along traditional gender lines. It doesn't have to, but I think there are deep biological reasons why this plays out in the averages. Said simply, men will break themselves in half to lead, sacrifice, and provide, making them ideal rockets. Women on the other hand are adept at securing cooperation and realizing their agenda by coordinating the actions of a team, making them the needed fuel to move the rocket. Here it is: Men and women, in general, want their partner to make them feel fundamentally different things. This disconnect creates a massive amount of friction. And if you misread the situation a sexy shower turns into a not sexy argument. And when you work together, misalignment in one area becomes destructive in both areas. And that brings us to the next step of working well with your partner. Step four. Create Rules of Engagement around how to deal with the collision of two modes of being. Romance and Business aren't like oil and water where they don't mix. They're like mentos and Coca Cola, they're explosive when put together. Rule number 1: Define your roles CLEARLY. Rule number 2: Rule 3: Partner only with your equal Rule 4: Act differently in your romantic partnership than in your business partnership Rule 5: Lead with love Rule 6: Over communicate. I hope hearing how Lisa and I have navigated this tricky terrain is helpful for you all. I hope that you take this merely as a starting point and you find what works best for you. I hope you understand the averages, but don't feel you need to conform to them. Find what works for you and live a life that you love.

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@ChrisyClass-zp2yh Says:
Both
@flavioptferreira Says:
Sorry, Tony Robbins. Total respect, but I get more wisdom, inspiration and actionable advice from Tom. The man just makes fucking sense!
@redlipmarketing Says:
I am coming from the Episode published on Spot fy... At some points I really thought Tom, had a death wish, or wanted your channel to be torched by feminists 😂😂... But hey, as a self-defined "black latina, strong, dominant in some instances, hetero flexible woman" ... Thank you for bringing, this to the spotlight. Just like Leila Hormozi said, you just need someone who goes 1 up. It is the dangerous man in command of their shadow thing Dr. Peterson's talks about... Now, seen the theory played out between you and Lisa, is such a gift. Thank you for sharing.
@lavedadean Says:
Lovely video and cute couple. Very Excellent points.
@goldgold4943 Says:
Pls remove background music
@Princess.Queen.Esther Says:
You are very smart! Love how aligned this information is and more of a confirmation to a lot of things. It’s very Powerful. 😊 definitely an ongoing conversation, but I love it!
@ellenc4872 Says:
There are many studies that show women excell in creativity and intuition (two important things for "vision") - conversely, men have a great capacity for making things happen. I think it depends on the couple's individal strengths and whether or not they subscribe to gender roles. Often the person with "vision" is described a a leader, but the person making it happen is just as much a leader. I like that you used the words CEO and COO to differentiate the roles. There isn't a "leader" and "follower" in a healthy relationship - there are two people coming together to make cool shit happen and have fun.
@emilybabcock5365 Says:
Worked with my husband from 7 a.m. until 10 p.m. every day except for when we had relief for 20 years dealing with a business so it is possible.
@jeanphelipperamosdeoliveir711 Says:
This is a master class on how to navigate a relationship. He talks about working with his wife but also gives a lot of tips about how to live a happy marriage with his wife. And to be honest if you run a family that is like a "business" because you have tasks and goals and all the sort of thing. Thus, this video applies to all couples with kids.
@romeovezo1691 Says:
Thank you Tom !
@TheMrCrabz Says:
Lol my guy said masturbate until you find the one 😂 that wild.
@rssoto8245 Says:
I believe this can be translated to managing the household ( similar situation ) . Tread household as a business.
@ThePushica Says:
This is the best video on the internet right now!
@sarahtonin8144 Says:
Hard to tell if this is the right platform for this. But ill try anyways as this is still considered business. Given the present conditions, is it better to invest into Real Estates or into Stocks? Which would yield better output.
@nadiyabikkuzina1095 Says:
This has to be the most valuable video ever. Thanks for sharing your learning and growth.
@crypto_que Says:
So far I’m loving this episode. If you haven’t already could* you do a master class or series breaking down all these different components? Men’s & women’s socialization is totally different but as you said we’re more alike than different. In today’s hypergamous landscape where women are starting to out earn men the dating pool is getting smaller and smaller. Those wolves howling in the background are getting louder & louder. I think detailing ways men could improve their odds would be highly appreciated. Tom thanks for all the gems so far.
@RosalieElnekave Says:
your videos are always amazing and of the highest value! thank you so much!
@JuanWonOneYuan Says:
this is a really outstanding video. so much wisdom condensed with clarity. bookmark this if own a business or plan to. i will definitely be rewatching this occasionally.
@TheMad0ne Says:
Sounds like there's trouble in paradise...
@LAila-qf4ww Says:
You and Lisa 🎉❤🎉
@LAila-qf4ww Says:
10:40😅
@melaniediaz9017 Says:
Men figure how to get a women but not keep 🥶
@JK-ek5jv Says:
Wow still watching but was surprised that the typical male role would be to envision and the female’s role would be to make it happen. I tend to love and have an easier time coming up with ideas and it has been less easy to put them into action overall. Being one who has done both regularly for my own business and endeavors, it’s interesting to hear your experience in all of this. Thanks for sharing!
@Christian23724 Says:
Tom Bilyeu really is the GOAT. Pumps out an unbelievable amount of valuable FREE content.
@ligiasommers Says:
Best episode, took tons of notes , thank you 🙏🏻🌹✨🙏🏻
@la1930 Says:
I do both! 🎯😳🌌🤷‍♀️✍️ From 👉🇨🇦💥
@Heros101 Says:
Awesome video !
@markb.8460 Says:
just wow.. 22:35
@CalvinGroover Says:
This is very safe advice ahaha
@Ant_Ponce Says:
Ahhhhh 18:50 I need to know the women of impact episode !
@z1sania Says:
23:00 I cried!
@gfrf0516 Says:
Tom Bilyeu, you and your wife are amazing couple. Thanks for inspiring. Thanks Tom for teaching every single aspect of your life as an example. That give me so much inspiration for love.
@matron5901 Says:
This is such a powerful video. I wonder how many marriages you will save Tom from this video. Thank you for making it 🙏
@anav8598 Says:
This was absolute GOLD! Thanks for the practical tips and heart warming stories— I definitely got teary eyed listening to how you two manage to navigate marriage and business together ❤
@dinosemr8141 Says:
💖💖💖❤️🙏❤️💖💖💖
@TimmyDahitman Says:
This was needed thanks bro
@PLTbyCormie Says:
I can definitely see why you two still have managed to stay together..very wise words ..If only you could get most people to drink this Kool-Aid ❤
@lilamnbdh967 Says:
Amazing , thank you so much Tom🙏❤️
@mpm721 Says:
Wow! This showed up less than 24 hrs after having a super difficult discussion with my wife about our business. After which, I was about ready to tell her I needed to step away for the good of our marriage and my mental health. I think now I want to have a viewing session with her so she can see this and see if we can re-align in a healthy & loving way, whether it means I stay in the business or go.off and do something else. THANK YOU!!!
@USmetallist Says:
YES YES YES... that how I kill my nerves 😂😊😄 as well
@ajaykoleti8932 Says:
Excited !!
@saloni2117 Says:
These topics are so helpful
@Kinugwa Says:
First view. First like. First comment.

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